没有你的第七十七天

Today is just like any other day, another day of insomnia.
went to sleep at 3 pm but was only able to fall asleep around 0830.
It's a torture to be in bed and yet not fall asleep.
77 days ago,
I did not know that at all.

Once I lie on your arm,
I fell asleep straight. Even when you were not by my side,
the latest I fell asleep on my own was 6 and at that time I was
tired just that I was waiting for you to finish work.

I set alarm to wake up early.
Woke up at 11,
As usual on my computer.
I was at the screen doing some application.
I was left all alone at home once again.

Does it mean when you lose happiness you lose hunger?
I used to be hungry all the time.
Today I don't feel hunger throughout the whole day.
Perhaps being alone made me imagination run wild.
I thought of so many things.
SO MANY NEGATIVE THINGS.
I don't want to be like that.

But I can't control,
tears ran down my cheeks,
blurred my image.

Sister bought me some biscuit from candy empire,
motive was to cheer me up.
I appreciated that BUT
I wish that she had more time with me.
Suppose to get TEP allocation but
because of my beautiful result.
I gotta wait.

Accompanied me to Rivervale plaza to pay off my bills
and some debts.
After such a long time I talked to michelle once again.
Guilt.
Because of myself,
I was not there for her.
Because of myself,
I left her alone.
I am so sorry.
Once again in this lonely night.
the song played again and again.

I am waiting,
waiting for what I believe in.
I am holding,
holding on with the strength I am left with.

今天是你离开我的第七十七天了。
每天起床看到bleahbleah。
看到挂在衣橱的裤子和上衣。
会想到你拥抱着我的画面。
那时候的我们，
感觉得到对方的心跳与呼吸。
本来以为对你的思念会跟着日子，
淡化。。
但是，相反的。
对你的思念，
压迫了我。。
让我忘记呼吸，
让我的心好痛好痛。
心就被凝的衣服。。
坐在沙发，想到七十七天前的你，
还坐在我身旁陪我看电视。
那是的你，虽然只顾着看电视。
但是，
只要你陪在我身边。。
我就幸福了。
今天，我又和你闹。
但是你，任然安抚着我。
让我觉得自己好弱。
对不起。